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When we start looking for a long-term partner or enter into a romantic relationship, many of us do so with a predetermined set of (often unrealistic) expectations—such as how the person should look and behave, how the relationship should progress, and the roles each partner should fulfill.
These expectations may be based on your family history, influence of your peer group, your past experiences, or even ideals portrayed in movies and TV shows. Wants include things like occupation, intellect, and physical attributes such as height, weight, and hair color.
For example, how well does this person hold up under pressure when things don't go well or when they're tired, frustrated, or hungry? Everyone has flaws, and for a relationship to last, you want someone to love you for the person you are, not the person you’d like to be, or the person they think you should be.
Besides, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing.
For example, it may be more important to find someone who is: Needs are different than wants in that needs are those things that matter to you most, such as values, ambitions, or goals in life.
Even if you’ve been burned repeatedly or have a poor track record when it comes to dating, these tips can help you to keep things in perspective and put you on the path to finding a loving relationship that lasts.
When you’re having trouble finding a love connection, it’s all too easy to become discouraged or buy into the destructive myths out there about dating and relationships.
Over time, and with enough effort, you can change the way you think, feel, and act.
Myth: Disagreements always create problems in a relationship.
Remember that first impressions aren't always reliable, especially when it comes to Internet dating.